Luke

I am very much in love with a man that I have waited four years for and I am currently still in the waiting process. The good news is that he has been waiting this long for me as well. Luke and I started dating the summer before I left for college, leaving little time for us to even build a solid friendship. So, over the past four years, we've lived in this limbo of dating, getting to know each other on a deeper level, building a solid foundation of trust, and falling deeper in love. I am so crazy about this guy that lives five hours from me that it hurts. I can physically feel my chest tighten as I type these words. Luke means everything to me and all I want to do is make him happy.

We are, by far, not the perfect couple. We are actually very different. For either one of us to deny this would be lying to ourselves. Luke loves to play Call of Duty and watch scary movies and I'd rather have nothing to do with either. I love to talk for hours on the phone and he sticks it out solely for me. Luke drives a 2006 Kawasaki 636 and I'm scared to death of him driving that motorcycle. I love to be around tons of people because I've never met a stranger in my life and Luke is really uncomfortable around people he doesn't know. And believe me, I could go on and on about our differences:) But as much as I sometimes let our differences scare me into doubt, Luke's love always seems to drive these fears out of me just as quickly as they showed up.

You see, I am one to figure things out. I like to research, see different sides or hear others' opinions. I love school and if there is one thing that school has taught me, it is how to come to an educated conclusion about an issue. Luke, on the other hand, is going to school for me, but does not enjoy it one bit. And the way he sees it is simply this: we'll make it work. He thinks why should we worry so far in advance about the future we have no control over? Let's just trust the Lord and love each other through it. We'll make decisions as they come along and need to be made. I can see my side and I can see his. I'm uptight and he is a free spirit. We're so different, and yet, we make a pretty cool balance when we do finally come to final decision. He relaxes me and reminds me that God is in control. I give his life a little more structure, reminding Him that God gives us divine instruction as well. As long as we're loving each other, compromising, and leaning on the Lord, we're good.

Last night, Luke and I had a disagreement. As of this morning, this disagreement doesn't even seem worth it anymore. All I know is that I love him so much. He is a gift God has given me and the tool God used to change my heart four years ago. Our differences may cause short-term grief at times, but we've made a promise to each other that no matter how mad we get, we always say "I love you" at the end of every telephone call. We do know, however, that at the root of all of our conflicts is the distance. We don't fight when we're together; we love each other through everything. So, we look forward to the day when we've graduated and can begin to really plan our lives together; when distance will no longer be an issue.

All I want to do is be with him and make him happy. I want to make his life better. In addition, and as if this post doesn't sound corny enough already, I can't wait to have dinner ready for him when he comes home. I can't wait to bake for him, walk our dog together, work out together, go to the movies just because, or just sit on our couch together. I hold on to these dreams because they get me through the tough times when I miss him the most. But Luke is totally worth the wait and we're only got 7 months left! I know we can do it. Luke and I can do anything:)

The Good Lord's Blessings

Alright everyone, listen up! Because I have some AMAZING news! On Monday morning, I received an email from CBS News in New York, offering me an internship with them for the spring 2010!! I prayed and thought this opportunity through all day Monday and accepted the internship Tuesday morning. WHAT A RELIEF it is to have secured in internship for next semester, my LAST semester of college, in New York! Needless to say, I am on cloud nine about this. Praise the Lord for His answers to our prayers for the the way He continues to shower His blessings on His people!

In addition to all of the hype about my internship with CBS News, I was at Youth Minister's Conclave 2009 Monday through Wednesday. This was amazing because I was with some of the people that I love most in the entire world when I received the email! Luke, Tyler, Shaune, Kristie, and I were blessed to have the opportunity to represent Camp Zephyr at Conclave this year and we had a blast! We ate at The Melting Pot for Tyler's 29th birthday on Monday night, we got to stay in a pretty cool hotel in Arlington, we heard Francis Chan speak, and we just got to catch up/spend time together. I absoluted loved representing Zephyr in this way and felt honored that the executive staff would ask me to be a part of this with them. I must say that I think we did an amazing job of networking and connecting with youth ministers from all over the country. Good job guys!!

And now I am working on my personal statement for law school applications and some religion homework, niether of which sound nearly as exciting as a CBS News internship or Conclave 2009, but I have to do them. Blah. I keep day dreaming about New York and I can't wait to start my New York blog! Get ready y'all; I'm taking you to the Big Apple with me!

Goodnight!

FALLing away...

This fall has been flying before my eyes. This semester, otherwise known as my last semester at Baylor (tear), is already half way over and I can hardly believe it. Between internship applications for New York, law school applications, 15 hours of classes, Tri Delta obligations, and an amazing boyfriend that lives 5 hours away, I haven't had much time to blog. But here are a few pictures from this semester so far. I will do my best to update my blog more after Baylor Homecoming this weekend because my life will slow down just a tiny bit. And then, once I'm in New York next semester, I'm sure you'll hear from me a ton! Love you all:)

In My Own Little Corner

Have you ever seen the original Cinderella movie? You know, the one with Ginger Rogers, Lesley Ann Warren, and Stuart Damon. If you have not seen this version, shame on you. Please find a way to see it as soon as possible. It is a classic.

In this movie, Cinderella sings a song titled "In My Own Little Corner," after she is bossed around for the millionth time by her step-mother. This song is freeing for poor Cinderella who is controlled by a wicked woman and despised by her ugly step-sisters. Her day dreams come to life as she sings from a little corner in the house, next to the fire place, designated for her.

I too have my own little corner. And when I sit in this corner, which could also be described as a nook, I, like Cinderella, sing and day dream. I play out scenes in my mind where I am walking down the streets of New York with the "You've Got Mail" soundtrack playing in the world around me. I dream about traveling back to Europe with friends or with Luke to explore and see more of God's beautiful world. I imagine what it will be like to be a law student and the different types of law I could practice. In my corner, "I can be whatever I want to be."

Sometimes these day dreams excite me and I can't concentrate on anything else but figuring out a way to make my dreams come true. Other times, my dreams strike a fear in my heart. What if I don't make it or I don't get the opportunity to live out the dreams I want so badly to become my reality? It is at this time, like Cinderella, "I'm glad to be back in my own little corner, all alone in my own little chair."

Here is a picture of my corner, where I study, apply for law school, look up internships in New York, read wedding blogs (yes, I admit it, I day dream about this too!), look for cheap plane tickets to Europe, and sing. I'm going to miss this cozy, little nook after I've moved to New York and left Baylor. But for now I'm going to drink my coffee, enjoy the slight drizzle outside, hum the tune to Cinderella's precious song, attempt to study for my religion test, and day dream in "my own little corner."

"In My Own Little Corner"

I'm as mild and as meek as a mouse
When I hear a command I obey.
But I know of a spot in my house
where no one can stand in my way.
In my own little corner in my own little chair
I can be whatever I want to be.
On the wings of my fancy I can fly anywhere
and the world will open its arms to me.
I'm a young Norwegian princess or a milkmaid
I'm the greatest prima donna in Milan
I'm an heiress who has always had her silk made
By her own flock of silkworms in Japan
I'm a girl men go mad for love's a game I can play with
cool and confident kind of air.
Just as long as I stay in my own little corner
All alone in my own little chair.
I can be whatever I want to be.
I'm a slave from Calcutta I'm a queen in Peru.
I'm a mermaid dancing upon the sea
I'm a huntress on an African safari.. it's a dangerous type of sport and yet it's fun
In the night I sally forth to seek my quarry
And I find I forgot to bring my gun.
I am lost in the jungle all alone and unarmed when I meet a lioness in her lair
Then I'm glad to be back in my own little corner,
All alone in my own little chair.